Award-winning singer Jordin Sparks has always considered herself to be a Christian, but it wasn’t until recently that she fully understood her relationship with God and Jesus.
Sparks took to social media last month to explain to fans and fellow worshippers how she once again found her identity in Christ, saying that before she fully embraced her faith, her “heart was only half in it.”
“I was lukewarm, which is pretty much the worst thing that you can do,” Sparks said.
Sparks said that she believed she would be happy because she “continued to do the norm that a Christian should do,” which included going to church, reading the Bible and being “good to other people.” At the time, she was finding successful in her music career and romantic relationships because she was “devoted” and pushed herself to achieve those goals, she said.
After some time, those successes were not enough, Sparks said.
“After a while, my behavior made me feel like [a] zombie, and I wasn’t sure who I was,” she said. “and it wasn’t working for me.”
Sparks said that at this turning point in her life, she simply believed that God was a “big creator” who “ruled over everything,” but she did not have a personal relationship with Him.
“And it wasn’t until I was completely broken or torn that Jesus poured his love on me…” the 2007 “American Idol” winner said, breaking down into tears.
Easter 2016 was the day Sparks decided to “completely surrender to God.”
“I proceeded to weep and ask for prayer over me and for Jesus to forgive and heal all the pain I was feeling,” she said.
Now, more than a year later, Sparks said the things that used to provide her with the “ultimate source of happiness” no longer apply.
“I now know that the only way to finally receive joy and contentment – for me – is to seek Him and really work on my relationship with Him – to follow and obey and to make decisions for Him because of Jesus, not because of myself,” she said.
Sparks now has a “peace” that she has “never had before,” she said, encouraging others to “trust God with your life.”
“He has always been by my side and is protecting and guiding me every step of the way,” she said. “And I know he loves me so much. And I know he loves you too. God bless you.”