Today’s culture has seen the denial of biology’s concept of sex and gender, with California going to the level of passing a law to punish caregivers who use incorrect pronouns. There are those who have suffered through hormone treatment, lied to in the name of access to what their doctors saw as “care.”
Two men, who are named in the Federalist as Paul and Taylor, recently shared their stories in the aptly titled “What Two Former Trans Men Want You To Know About All The Lies.”
Paul, who is now 38, worries about if he will even live to old age, and says that he’s “been forced into celibacy.” His detransition, which doctors told him he could not actually do, was full of physical and emotional pain.
It was in high school when Paul learned about transgenderism and thought that was his answer. During that time he described having “girlish” interests that made him feel ashamed, while also struggling with isolation and confusion.
Paul is not the only young person to have experienced gender dysphoria, which he has officially now been diagnosed with. As professionals and those with prior experience with transgenderism and gender dysphoria themselves have explained, hormone therapy, drugs, and surgery are not what is needed. They need counseling and support, especially with the mental health issues that follow, as they did with Paul, and seem to have been worsened.
For children considering transitioning, Paul cautions them to “don’t.” The rest of his story should be a reason why.
After his move to San Francisco, “in search of community of acceptance,” as the Federalist describes it, Paul found a community health clinic. At his very first visit he was given hormones to transition from male-to-female and given very little information about something so life changing. Even when he asked, Paul was told “not to worry.”
Paul would be misled and taken advantage of in other ways. He was recommended surgery, so as to not suffer through hormones and medication. When he tried to stop it, he was anesthetized. Paul describes having experienced constant groin pain, and bleeding a year later. Again, his request to be informed seemed to be dismissed. “I was told to wait it out, see a specialist, and not to get a lawyer.”
After confronting his doctor, he learned he had been lied to. He couldn’t stop hormones after all.
It was finally after attempting suicide that Paul sought out help, and began to go back living as a man.
Taylor found himself in a similar situation at 23, when it “started simply” and “all it took was self-declaration,” as Taylor began living as a woman. A year later, he sought the transition process with hormones, and just like Paul, was not given the true care and attention he ought to have been given for something so serious:
I went to an endocrinologist, who gave me a prescription on the first visit, before my blood work results even came back. ‘It’ll be fine, congratulations!’ was his attitude. Taylor says “I wish I had been challenged by a doctor” and that “The doctor should’ve challenged me.”
He detransitioned a year later, having expressed disappointment in the system.
The issue of suicide came up for both young men, which is tragically high for the transgender community. Walt Heyer, who himself experienced time living as a woman, says he has heard from many who were disappointed in the system, just like Taylor was, and warns against surgery which could lead to confusion and disappointment, and thus suicide.
He also described advocating for sex change procedures as “false hope,” which may serve to confuse transgender individuals even more. This is especially the case when doctors mislead and lie to their patients, as they did with Paul and Taylor, rather than provide them with true care.
When it comes to transgender rights, perhaps that of properly informing and caring for these individuals ought to take first priority.